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Faith Grief and Mental Health

Precious Memories: Celebrating 60 Years of My Late Mother Dixie

Today, I’m celebrating 60 years of my late mother Dixie.

I had a pleasant surprise in my inbox this morning. It was an email from BlogHer, explaining that they were featuring my recent post, “Dear Mom: You Were My First Blessing,” on their website and social media accounts today.  I’m not sure if the ladies at BlogHer realize that today would have been my mom’s 60th birthday, but it can’t be just a coincidence that they picked October 11 to showcase my letter to her.

A few months ago, I shared my brother’s poetic tribute to our mother.  Today, in celebration of my mom’s birthday, I am posting tributes written by my dad and by one of my mom’s best friends.

celebrating 60 years

Celebrating 60 Years of My Mother Dixie

From my dad

Lovely Lady’s Legacy

Like it or not, we are all leaving a legacy of our lives. We often go about our busy days without giving much thought to the cumulative effect of the choices we make, the actions we choose or the words we utter. This lovely lady lived with purpose and tapped into the power of God’s love for us.

Dixie taught me early on that words matter. She was not prone to idle chatter or flippant remarks. Not one to engage in sarcastic remarks about another. One might attribute her convictions concerning communication to the fact that she earned a degree in English and taught teenagers in public schools the fine art of using vocabulary properly. While true, this is only a small part of the reason. No, the big answer is that she knew so well how words could make others feel. She recognized the sting and disabling effect of bitter and sharp words. She understood well how words of kindness and compassion could make one feel loved and appreciated. And she was keenly aware of how loving talk, combined with a loving touch, could quickly disarm a tense situation.

Dixie learned early on from her parents that choices were personal and often profound.  She learned that her decisions not only affected her future, but exponentially influenced her family and friends, her church fellowship, her community.  It would be fair to say that she was a “big picture” person. While I could easily get lost in the details (or while driving the car!), she was always looking ahead and weighing the cost of her choices.  She saw the road ahead and how to navigate life’s choices.

Dixie’s rich legacy includes impressive Texas history, very capable and compassionate children, countless students schooled in swimming, language, etiquette and ethics, passions for art, animals and adventure, a fierce loyalty and advocacy for friends and family.  This all suggests a full and virtuous life, but it’s her love of God and His saving grace that guided her daily living and filled her days.  Growing up with loving, Christian parents afforded her a strong foundation on which to build a life of devotion to biblical principles.  This served her so well all through her life.

When I met Dixie through her neighbor during our college years, I found her breathtakingly beautiful, inside and out. A genteel southern belle, well-mannered but sophisticated. We began our relationship studying together in the evenings at her small four-plex. She focused on graduate degree coursework. I studied her. My feelings quickly grew beyond infatuation with this gorgeous gal, and I found myself falling in love with the girl of my dreams.

I had just returned from a summer job in Virginia, having been baptized into Christ Jesus by the young minister that I lived with that summer.  I began attending the A&M Church of Christ and discovered during our study times that she had been worshiping there for years.  And I took this as a sign that God was at work here. We soon began to discuss God’s Word and she helped me immeasurably to grow in my new walk with Him.  We were engaged to be married only 5 months after we met.

There is so much I could share with you about this lovely lady and her legacy, like how incredible she was at comforting and protecting us when we were ill or discouraged or feeling oppressed.  Or her gift for family ancestral research.  Her sought-after leadership in teaching young married couples’ and women’s classes in various congregations.  Or her being the first Community Relations Officer for Round Rock I.S.D.

Her dedicated service a dozen years ago, as a member of the team that was instrumental in determining the joining of two congregations together to become Western Hills Church of Christ. What I believe that sweet Dixie would want me to impart to you is simply this: “Love the Lord with all your heart, mind, and soul,” and “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  And finally, “Always do your best to do the right thing.” Godspeed, Lovely Lady.

Scott Stucky

From Anne, one of her closest friends

Top Ten Ways Our Lives Will Change Without Dixie

10. It won’t be often that we will hear a grown woman always and frequently refer to her parents as “Mother and Daddy” – never “my parents” or “mom and dad.”

9. We will have to discover our own circuitous “shortcuts” in and around Austin. These “shortcuts” weave through and around neighborhoods and areas that usually might be avoided but were fascinating and helped us explore the diversity of our city. So what if these “shortcuts” added extra minutes and miles? They kept us away from the crazy traffic and provided great entertainment while accomplishing mundane tasks.

8. The restaurants will miss Dixie’s business. Few people enjoy eating good food with such relish and sound effects as Dixie. She knew where to find the best pimento cheese sandwiches, cookies, chocolate covered strawberries, breakfast tacos, cokes with ice…no matter how obscure or off route the place.

7. We will miss having a true confidant to share our feelings and to trust with our deepest secrets. That shoulder was always there.

6. How will we know the names of all of the flowers and birds we come across? Stopping and smelling the roses was not just a saying with Dixie.

5. We now have the chance to brag about our kids. There wasn’t much open airspace to do that around Dixie. That space was consumed by Dixie discussing all of the wonderful traits of Lauren and Russell. Seriously, can they be that perfect?

4. We never will know how completely spoiled her grandchildren would be. But we do know that Lauren and Russell no longer would be so close to perfect. Samantha and subsequent others would claim that spot and would have absolutely zero faults. Sorry, Lauren and Russell. Your ratings definitely would fall.

3. The sights, sounds, nomenclature, and history of Sealy, Texas will have to be brought to us by someone else now. Who knew there were black lands in Sealy?

2. Country music lovers will have a hard time converting rockers without Dixie singing and playing her favorites. She’d burst out in song whenever the mood struck and her joy in the music was irresistible.

1. The number one reason that our lives will change forever is that there will be an empty space in our hearts. She was the best daughter, mother, wife, and friend that anyone could ever hope for. We will miss Dixie’s kind, loving and sweet nature. There never will be another like her. We are incredibly lucky to have crossed paths with Dixie. She willingly and selflessly gave her love and support. I always will treasure our special friendship, memories, and love. I miss her.

Anne Caton